greygirlbeast | "Enduring notions, new found promise, that the end will never come."

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"Enduring notions, new found promise, that the end will never come."

I have an email this morning from director Frank Woodward, maker of Lovecraft: Fear of the Unknown. Frank writes. "Just wanted you to know that Lovecraft won Best Documentary Film at Comic-Con. Your section on Deep Time continues to mesmerize. People consistently mention it to me after they see the film." So, that's cool. Very cool. May it win many more awards.

Yesterday, I wrote 1,015 words on "Derma Sutra (1891)," for Sirenia Digest #32. This piece is genuinely "weird erotica." No. Ditch the silly, pc "erotica" tag. This is "weird pornography." If Lovecraft had ever decided to write porno, well, I think, honestly, it would have looked a lot like "Derma Sutra (1891)." Even though there's not a single tentacle or a squamous batrachian fish-person in sight.

I haven't been wanting to write here about my dratted health. The last month I've been struggling with pain from that upper left molar I cracked in the grand mal seizure back in October. My dentist in Birmingham was skeptical of her chances of saving it. And now I'm thinking that she didn't. She sent me off to Providence with a penicillin script and another for Lortab, should the tooth go hot before I find a dentist. I have not yet found a dentist. And I've only taken one of the Lortab, as ibuprofen is controlling the pain, mostly, even though it does a number on my stomach (and me and pain meds have an ugly history I do not want to see replayed). So, if I have seemed out of step or extra curmudgeonly or whatever, it's mostly the pain and worry about the pain and the uncertainty and so forth. The pain wakes me in the mornings. It's become that very first thing of the day, this sensation like someone's socked me in the jaw right proper. But I absolutely can't stop work on The Red Tree and the digest to have a tooth pulled or root canaled or whatever. I cannot risk being sidetracked, not at this point (yes, this is part of the "romantic" life of a freelance writer).

Spooky's added a PC copy of the leather-bound edition of Frog Toes and Tentacles to the new round of eBay auctions, along with another copy of Alabaster Please have a look, and bid, should you be so disposed. Thanks. And I'll remind you that subpress is now taking preorders on A is for Alien.

After the writing yesterday, we escaped the house and headed for Moonstone Beach. I was hoping that the storms on Sunday would have cast up some interesting things. And, in fact, when we reached Moonstone, we discovered wonderful lag deposits of pebbles, which are not normally present there, not in such great numbers. So, as the sun set and Asian families fished for blue crabs in Trustom Pond (using chicken legs on string), we crawled about on the sand and stone, looking for bits of beach glass. Spooky found the best pieces. My eyes are just too lousy these days. We picked up a bag full of plastic garbage. At some point, I just lay down on the wet pebbles and sand, just lay there listening to the surf and the birds. And it occurred to me, This is what I have, and this is why I do the writing, and put up with the pain. This is why I'm hanging on, because I can lie on the beach, with the sea lapping at my feet, and know that this one thing, at least, is real. It's not much, but, then again, it's everything, the seashore, that liminal space where earth and ocean meet. It's what I desire, and what I have earned. Ah, and I found a very nice carapace of a spider crab (Libinia emarginata) and brought it home with me. We left as it was getting dark, and the Asian families were still snagging crabs with chicken legs.

Set me aflame and cast me free.
Away, you wretched world of tethers...

After dinner at Iggy's in Narragansett, we stopped by Spooky parents' on the way back, to get cucumbers and yellow crooked-neck squash and eggs and just visit. The sky is so marvelous over their farm, the stars so brilliant. Heading back into town last night, I think my mind was still lying on the beach. Entering Providence, I had some weird flashback to Southland Tales, and it seemed to me —— and the sensation lingers this afternoon —— Here is the Future, as much as there is ever a "future," and it is bizarre and deadly, ugly and wondrous, and I have no place here. It's an unsettling sort of realization, and yet I can't find any fault with it. I think it was about 10:30 pm when we finally got home again.

Oh, there was a question from a reader, who asks, "I was reading some of your old posts today and it reminded me you sometimes referred to your 'favorite Thai place' in Atlanta. Could you share the name with me or in the blog?" And yes, now that I am here in Providence and no longer have to worry about dinner being interrupted by a well-meaning fan, I can (it actually happened at that restaurant a couple of times, which is why I never named it). Thai Bowl in Decatur, though the old, now-deceased location off Highland was better. Thai Bowl is one of the few things I miss about Atlanta.

And one last thing in this long entry. Yes, to create an avatar in Second Life that looks good, that moves well, etc., you will have to go beyond the default freebie av. And roleplay is far better with good avs and decent animation overrides and so forth. But, here's the thing —— compared to the charges incurred by popular MMORPGs, (which SL is not, not an MMORPG, I mean), such as WoW and The Lord of the Rings Online: Shadows of Angmar, creation of a good av is really incredibly cheap. For $10 (US; and that's a nice pile of Lindens), or $20 (if you want to get really fancy), you can create a wonderful, unique character, and it's not like there are monthly charges on free accounts, or like the rp sims charge you to play there. Just saying....

Below are four photos from yesterday evening:

Zillions of pebbles.

These stones are derived from granites within the Permian-aged Narragansett Pier Plutonic Suite.

An odd photo of me looking for beach glass. Maybe it would not be so odd had Spooky told me she was taking it.

Iggy's!

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Wow, the moonstone beach you have there is much better for moonstone gathering than the one I stopped by in California!

If things work out for the two of you to come down to NYC for the exhibit, do you think there's any chance we could catch a ride back up there with you afterwards and maybe we could visit that beach together?

Plus, I'm seriously needing some doughboys!

Wow, the moonstone beach you have there is much better for moonstone gathering than the one I stopped by in California!

It really is a marvelous place.

If things work out for the two of you to come down to NYC for the exhibit, do you think there's any chance we could catch a ride back up there with you afterwards and maybe we could visit that beach together?

You're more than welcome to come back with us, and even spend a couple of nights here, should you wish. The only thing is, we would likely be taking the train to NYC and back. Unless, maybe, there's free parking at or near FIT.

Maybe it would not be so odd had Spooky told me she was taking it.

Portrait of the author as tide-tossed oddity. Score.

I am very glad you have the sea.

Portrait of the author as tide-tossed oddity. Score.

If only I were nude...

hmmm in that position? Unusual, but not uninteresting

Unusual, but not uninteresting

It's the unusual that would, for me, make it interesting.

If only I were nude...

Okay; next photo shoot.

i hope it wouldnt get her into trouble to be nude on that beach

i hope it wouldnt get her into trouble to be nude on that beach

As it happens, nudism is not allowed on Moonstone Beach. Alas.

The pebbles remind me of Jasper Beach in Maine, which reminds me that I have been landlocked in central Connecticut too long. When next you see it, please bear my regards to the sea and tell it I'll try to visit soon, even if I have to settle for Long Island between us.

When next you see it, please bear my regards to the sea and tell it I'll try to visit soon, even if I have to settle for Long Island between us.

Will do.

This is what I have, and this is why I do the writing, and put up with the pain. This is why I'm hanging on, because I can lie on the beach, with the sea lapping at my feet, and know that this one thing, at least, is real.

Thank you for posting that. For a long while now I've been searching for an answer to why I'm hanging on. It helps to know that it can be something as small as lying on the beach.

Yes, to create an avatar in Second Life that looks good, that moves good, etc., you will have to go beyond the default freebie av.

1. Until July 31st Nomine is having a $100L sale on their older male and female skins.

2. Animation Warehouse offers starter AOs for both men and women for $250L each. While they might not be ideal for some people, they're at least a step up from the default walk/sits/stands. (While I'm not certain about this, I suspect they can also be edited to use individual animations purchased from various places later on.)

3. Canimal has a huge cart of freebies outside of the store. Most of the clothing is for women, but there are a few items for men in there as well.

4. Silent Sparrow offers a free package of clothing for new avatars. I believe the clothing within is mostly unisex. One might need to join the Silent Sparrow group in order to pick up the freebies, but the owner is always giving out wonderful items, so it's well worth it.

5. Panache offers two $5L packs of hair for females. One of the styles is pigtails and the other is a more dressy/formal style. Both packs come with about 20 colors of hair, plus the hair is copy/mod so you can make even more colors if you choose.

For a long while now I've been searching for an answer to why I'm hanging on. It helps to know that it can be something as small as lying on the beach.

You're welcome. But, I think, what I'm realizing is that it's not a small thing at all, but a vast thing.

1. Until July 31st Nomine is having a $100L sale on their older male and female skins.

Tete a Pied, makers of fine skins, is doing something similar.

If you don't mind, I may repost your 5 points in the journal tomorrow, as it's stuff it simply did not occur to me to mention.

But, I think, what I'm realizing is that it's not a small thing at all, but a vast thing.

*nod* Good point.

Tete a Pied, makers of fine skins, is doing something similar.

Thanks for the tip.

If you don't mind, I may repost your 5 points in the journal tomorrow, as it's stuff it simply did not occur to me to mention.

I don't mind at all. As you know, there are a lot of freebies to be found in SL, so it helps to know where some of the decent ones are. Nevermore also has well-made clothing at affordable prices (especially the Dolfie boots) but I didn't include the store in my list because she's not currently running any sales or offering any freebies.

The Silent Sparrow freebie pack (for AVs 30 days and younger) is free for anyone, as is the Lucky Chair. She does freebies for group members, as well. I own a ton of her designs, but oddly find that the free outfits tend to be some of my favorites.

I just made up a freebies and cheap stuff card for the Sirenia Players group, but only sent it out to one person so far because I will probably need to add some more landmarks to it later tonight.

It's good to know that new avatars don't have to be in the SS group to get the freebie pack. If I had my way, I'd own at least one of everything in her store, though, as you mentioned, her group freebies are excellent.

I know Nineveh's working on some nice stuff for freebies from Rara Avis, which is now open, by the way. Let us know if there's anything Artemisia or Nareth would like from the store, and Nin will hook you up. :)

Let us know if there's anything Artemisia or Nareth would like from the store, and Nin will hook you up. :)

Thanks And I look forward to seeing her store!

First:
This is what I have, and this is why I do the writing, and put up with the pain. This is why I'm hanging on, because I can lie on the beach, with the sea lapping at my feet, and know that this one thing, at least, is real.

Second:
Thank you for posting that. For a long while now I've been searching for an answer to why I'm hanging on. It helps to know that it can be something as small as lying on the beach.

Third:
Same here, in some ways. Thanks, Caitlin.

Same here, in some ways. Thanks, Caitlin.

Again, you're welcome.

You're hitting so many of my favorite Rhode Island places -- thanks so much for these photos!

If and when you get around to checking out dentists, may I recommend Jean Arthur? She did a lot of great work for me (and had good referrals when what I needed went beyond her specialties). She describes her practice as "holistic dentistry".

For a good five seconds, I looked at the picture of you on the beach and thought 'Wow, what an odd piece of driftwood'. Then I read the caption.

For a good five seconds, I looked at the picture of you on the beach and thought 'Wow, what an odd piece of driftwood'. Then I read the caption.

When I first saw the photograph, I couldn't figure out where my head had gone...then I mistook my raised left arm for my head, and wondered how it could possibly appear so narrow...

Congratulations on the documentary!!

Your section on Deep Time continues to mesmerize
hmmmm a DVD is needed....i need to see this documentary

I am on ibuprofen right now too, since 2 weeks. Actually this morning i noticed my pain gone, but there are only for 2 days left (on a 2 a day basis) so i will finish it.
Doesnt do anything on my stomach. I know about pain and from the recent weeks can closely relate to things like "waking up with pain". I feel deeply sorry for you. LOL more than i felt sorry for myself.

for a place where i have never been to, your photos and more your words about moonstone beach make it one of my favourite places. Won't take the place Venice has in my heart, but it is surely lovely. See you are also a brilliant writer when you describe how you sit on a beach.

hmmmm a DVD is needed....i need to see this documentary

It is already in the works, I believe.

Won't take the place Venice has in my heart, but it is surely lovely.

I hope to see Venice someday.

I hope to see Venice someday.

i would love to organize your stay there

i would love to organize your stay there

Are you in Venice?

No, in Munich, but i have been to Venice countless times.
I truely love this whole place. What it is, was, could have been then and now, the perfect idol in our imagination and the truth. Many promises and dreams

Let's say i know what to show you

Let's say i know what to show you

I will continue, then, to aspire to another trip to Europe someday. Munich has also long been on my list.

you two are geek-girls, so i definatly know what to show you in Munich *muahaha*

River dialogue, cut from Serenity: "There's no pattern to the pebbles here. They're completely random. I tried to count them, but you drove too fast. Hummingbird."

River at the beach. I want to picture River at the beach. I imagine it would soothe her. It soothes me (yay for living less than two hours from the Oregon Coast) and it soothes you.

And I love the accidental abstraction of the photo of you.

If Lovecraft had ever decided to write porno, well, I think, honestly, it would have looked a lot like "Derma Sutra (1891)."

I get the feeling that real porn, even just seeing it (let alone writing it), would've given Lovecraft a headache.

Great news on the Lovecraft doc, and people's reaction to your bit. Looking forward to seeing the film. I'm guessing the HPL Film Festival 2008 will show it. (Are you still on for HPL Film Fest 2009?)

"There's no pattern to the pebbles here. They're completely random. I tried to count them, but you drove too fast. Hummingbird."

I do adore those lines...

River at the beach. I want to picture River at the beach. I imagine it would soothe her. It soothes me (yay for living less than two hours from the Oregon Coast) and it soothes you.

It does. It silences the ever present roar behind my eyes. It engulfs me.

I get the feeling that real porn, even just seeing it (let alone writing it), would've given Lovecraft a headache.

Oh, at least.

(Are you still on for HPL Film Fest 2009?)

Yep.

Sorry to ask -because it really is not at all related to Moonstone Beach -directly-
What was the name of that Peter Gabriel song that you quoted sunday? I never paid him much attention after Genesis, But those Lyrics are VERY NICE.

Sorry, It's also VERY LATE, and I should have read your entire post "After The Flood" is most likely the song. And I am most likely done being Conscious for one day.

Sorry, It's also VERY LATE, and I should have read your entire post "After The Flood" is most likely the song. And I am most likely done being Conscious for one day.

Yes, "Here Comes the Flood."

You should really listen the Peter Gabriel. He was certainly the best part of Genesis (I listened to their early stuff back when I was in high school, but soon discovered that Peter Gabriel was where the real talent lay).

wow....I've never seen pebbles on a beach before.

*blinks* They're pretty!

Congrats on the Lovecraft thing. Will Do you think that will be in theatres? Also, GO GET THAT TOOTH FIXED!

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"Enduring notions, new found promise, that the end will never come."

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Pebbles and more

Re: Pebbles and more

in a totally unrelated direction

Nevermind

Re: Nevermind

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Lovecraft, Etc.